The Adventures and Misadventures of a Neer Do Well Artist Living in Baltimore.

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Location: Baltimore, Maryland, United States

I am a visual artist and writer living in Baltimore. I don't have any artist friends. Frankly, artists scare me, there so darn flaky. The above picture is either of me or proof that I'm a pretty decent artist. My goal is to be a self sufficient artist, whereas I wouldn't have to do something else in the day in order to eke out an existence. I also like to attend various cultural events around town. I go to plays, the symphony, etc. Also, I have Asperger's Syndrome. I found this out recently and it has explained a heck of a lot as to why I am as I am.

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Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Here is my list of worst movies of 2005. These are movies that I feel were not worth the money I paid to see them. They were nothing more than expensive made for TVmovies or in one a case a boring episode of the Discovery channel writ large. As I did yesterday I am limiting this to movies I actually paid money to see and now regret. Obvious choices like Deuce Bigelow: European Gigilo and The Dukes of Hazzard are not included because I was smart enough to avoid them. However, I was not smart enough to avoid these five gems.

And in no particular order here is my short list of worst movie of 2005.....


, originally uploaded by willisgirl.

March of the Penguins...I know that I am probably alone in this, but I really felt bored out of mind while watching this movie. I fell asleep several times. I was waiting for some fisticuffs or maybe a car chase to occur. Sadly, there was no action what so ever in this penguin movie. Not even hot Cinemax after dark penguin sex. I feel that this movie would have been best aired on the Discovery channel instead of hoisting it on paying movie goers.

Fantastic Four...This was an ok movie. But after Spiderman came out the bar has been raised for comic book movies to be more. I hope that they do a better job of developing a better script with Fantastic Four 2.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory...I found this movie to be an absolutely stupid and pointless remake of a film classic, Willie Wonka & The Chocolate Factory. There were so many things about this movie I hated. Chief amongst the things I hated was Johnny Depps portrayal of Willie Wonka. He was doing nothing more than a very creepy Michael Jackson impersonation.

Another thing I hated was the tacked on storyline about Willie Wonkas father. Nowhere in the Ronald Dahl book did it mention or allude to Willie Wonka having father issues. I hate it when movies add sub plots for the sake of making something more modern. Also I really loathed the new songs that the Oompa Loompa sang. In my opinion none of these new songs were as memorable as the ones in the original movie. In my opinion if it aint broke dont fix it!!!

Must Love Dogs...I found this movie to be a lifeless paint by numbers romantic comedy. John Cusack and Diane Lane could have done much better. I know in my original review I said I would buy this movie to add to my John Cusack movie collection. In after thought I think adding this movie would be a big mistake. I prefer to remember Cusack in his glory days and not in the times he had to sink to appear in tripe like this.

The Island...This I felt was not terribly bad for a TV movie. However, the problem was I paid money to see it!! This movie I feel is best viewed on a Saturday afternoon between channel surfing.

link | posted by gail at 8:59 PM |


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